Friday, March 12, 2010

randomness i guess

I seem to never use this blog anymore, but I though that I might use it to vent this one time. Ill see how it works. No one reads it anyway, but at least it may help

So, as a child, playing in the sandbox and swimming in the pool were the funnest times of my life. My only worry, the thought that I might get put in the "time out" chair. Remember the "time out" chair? I spent a fair part of my life sitting in time out wandering: "What did I do to deserve this? You only put me here to make me mad!" Looking back, I realize that the time out chair never really helped. It got me thinking, but not about what I had done. I always plotted about what I was going to do next. Who's drink would I mess with? Should I freeze my brothers' underwear? I miss those days when nothing seemed to matter, when I had no care in the world except what I was going to play with that day.

As I've grown up, I realize that those WERE the best times of my life. I had my papa, I had my toys, I had my friends. But just because I had so much, and just because I may miss it, does not mean that those days have to be the best days of my life, I still have many more to come! I miss not having any worries or responsibilities, but with responsibility come greatness. I get to hang out with my friends, drive my own car, and just do my own thing. Worries, there isn't anything good about them, not that I can find at least.

I have so many worries now. Sometimes it's hard to escape them. My friends betray me, they stab me in the back, but I try to forgive and forget. I give them a second chance. Sometimes though, they really hurt me... and I know for a fact that they do it on purpose. They know what gets to me and tears me down, so they do it. Why? I don't have a clue, but it's only high school, so I'm hoping things will change. I'd rather not linger on this though, no good can come from it.

I do so much now that I used to never do. I play softball, even though I always get injured, I sing in choir, or at least I used to until my schedule got messed up, I get to hang out with my friends, as long as my mom knows where I'm at and when I'm coming home, and I get to do so much more. I don't know why I worry sometimes, I just let the stress of being a Junior i high school get to me I guess.

Well I hope everyone reading this has a fantastic day! And thanks for taking the time to read this, I really wasn't expecting anyone too. It is just a bunch of randomness. (is 'randomness' a word)?

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